Are You Honest With Yourself? Six Steps To Living a More Authentic Life

Honesty can be uncomfortable. However, uncovering lies and having to work through the consequences of those lies can be even more painful. 

Being truthful is a rare and valuable trait in a world filled with masks and facades. It’s a virtue we look for in others and like to claim to have. But, can you claim truth-telling as a virtue if you’re lying to yourself? 

How do you know if you are being honest with yourself? Let's explore six steps that can help unravel the layers of self-deception and embrace the liberating power of authenticity.

Spend Time in Self-Reflection.

  • “Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts!” - Psalm 139:23, ESV

  • The best relationships happen when two people come together who are completely honest with themselves and with their partner. When one is keeping a secret from the other it causes an impassable divide and destroys intimacy. This is also true in our relationship with God.

  • The first step to honesty, with others and ourselves, is self-reflection. Take a moment to pause and honestly evaluate your thoughts, actions, and motivations. Start by asking God to reveal any areas in your life that you are blind to.

  • Ask yourself tough questions about your choices and behaviors. Dig deep and be willing to confront the uncomfortable truths that may surface. Rigorous honesty allows for personal growth and will help you regret-proof your life. Listen to Pastor Bryant Golden’s message Better Decisions, Fewer Regrets Part 1 for more insight on what it looks like to take an honest self-inventory. 

Embrace Vulnerability.

  • Being honest with yourself requires vulnerability. It means acknowledging your imperfections, fears, and insecurities. Avoiding or suppressing aspects of yourself only perpetuates self-deception. 

  • Embrace vulnerability as a strength, not a weakness. It's through vulnerability that you can authentically connect with your true self. To do this you must uncover your own imperfections and fears. 

  • This step also requires a little self-forgiveness. When we address our imperfections and past mistakes we need to do so with grace. When we refuse to forgive ourselves for the past, we end up stuck in the lie that we will never be good enough or we don’t deserve better. 

  • As you evaluate your life and uncover your imperfections, remember, that yesterday’s mistakes belong to yesterday. Today you get to take a step forward to wholeness and the person you were created to be. Remember that everyone struggles. Getting real about your vulnerabilities is where growth starts. 

Seek Feedback.

  • “Iron sharpens iron, and so one man sharpens another.” Proverbs 27:17 ESV 

  • Sometimes, an external perspective can provide the clarity you need. Seek feedback from trusted friends, family, or mentors who can offer objective insights. 

  • Try looking at your situation from someone else’s point of view. What might look like the obvious next step to you might reveal itself as a negative pattern or trauma response to a close friend. 

  • Others may see aspects of your life more clearly than you do. Constructive criticism can be a powerful tool for personal growth and a mirror, reflecting areas where you might be deceiving yourself.

Challenge Your Beliefs.

  • Honest self-evaluation involves challenging your own beliefs and assumptions. Be open to questioning your perspectives and be willing to adapt when necessary. 

  • It's okay to change your mind and adjust your course as you learn more about yourself and the world around you.. As we grow in maturity we begin to see things differently (1 Corinthians 13:11). 

Stop Overcommitting.

  • Busyness is often a distraction and used to suppress or ignore bigger issues. A full calendar might make you feel needed and important, but it can also be a way to simply avoid facing your inner self. 

  • Embrace stillness in order to stay present in the moment. Learn to observe your thoughts without judgment. Quiet moments will allow you to recognize patterns of self-deception. 

Practices such as prayer, meditation, and mindful breathing can create a space for self-awareness and deepen your closeness with God (Psalm 46:10).

Seek Accountability.

  • Take responsibility for your actions. It's easy to shift blame onto external factors, but true honesty involves acknowledging your role in situations. When you hold yourself accountable, you empower yourself to make positive changes and avoid falling into the trap of self-deception.

  • It helps to have close trusted friends who will speak truth into your life. Finding those friendships can be difficult but they are also so important. 

Honesty with oneself requires courage, vulnerability, and a commitment to truth. As uncomfortable as it may be, the path to self-honesty is liberating and transformative. If you value the truth, tell the truth—even to yourself. Embracing honesty in all aspects of your life is the key to living a fulfilled and authentic existence.

CENTERPOINT CHURCH IS READY TO WALK WITH YOU ON YOUR FAITH JOURNEY

At Centerpoint, our community believes in purpose and passion, and we would love to walk with you on your journey to finding yours. In fact, we recently tackled this idea of living authentically during our sermon series, Living with Yourself

Do you want to grow in your faith, or are you simply curious about who this Jesus guy is? You’re not alone. We encourage you to listen to our podcast series online and welcome you to come to one of our Sunday morning services in Valrico, Florida.


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