Why people leave the church
Over the last few years, the number of Americans regularly attending church has significantly decreased — people are leaving the church faster than ever. Churches are consistently seeing their weekly and yearly attendance numbers drop, especially among young people. The modern church is in a crisis. Why are people leaving the church so quickly? And what can the church do about it? Here are a few reasons people are leaving the church so quickly, as well as a few things churches can do to help their congregation feel heard and seen.
3 reasons that people leave the church
They’ve experienced “church hurt.” Church hurt is defined as “[experiencing] a degree of distance, pain or judgment from your church community.” Church hurt exists on a scale, and whether intentional or unintentional, churches sometimes cause hurt in their congregation. Churchgoers may hear wonderful messages about salvation and the grace of God, but if they don’t feel like the church is a representation of that, they’re likely to leave. Hypocrisy, blame and spiritual abuse should never be tolerated in the church. “If anyone boasts, ‘I love God,’ and goes right on hating his brother or sister, thinking nothing of it, he is a liar. If he won’t love the person he can see, how can he love the God he can’t see? The command we have from Christ is blunt: Loving God includes loving people. You’ve got to love both.” (1 John 4:20-21 MSG).
They don’t feel safe asking spiritual or religious questions. Pushing away questions that the congregation has is one of the most harmful things a church can do. Often, the rejection of these questions comes across as a lack of transparency, which can be hurtful to members and may cause them to leave. The church is there to help its congregation grow in their love and desire for Christ, not to minimize valid questions or criticisms. If Jesus was willing to answer questions on hard topics, the church should be as well.
The church isn’t willing to preach on hard topics. Often, controversial topics like racism, gun violence, abortion, and more are completely ignored or overlooked in churches. When pastors pick sermon topics, they shouldn’t stick purely to what feels safe or what has been preached before and met with a positive reaction. Churchgoers often want their local church to challenge them to think about deep topics. The Bible doesn’t shy away from hard topics — in fact, the Bible is transparent in admitting that our world is fallen and broken. When the church ignores this and only preaches the “easiest” sermons, members are likely to go elsewhere or leave the faith completely.
What can churches do to make their congregation feel heard?
Be more welcoming. The church should be a safe place where everyone feels welcomed and desired, not a place where people feel judged or pushed away. From the time that churchgoers pull into the parking lot to the time they leave the service, they should feel like they are valued. “So reach out and welcome one another to God’s glory. Jesus did it; now you do it!” (Romans 15:7 MSG).
Celebrate new guests and members. When a first-time visitor comes to the church, they should be met with open arms. Visitors should leave the church for the day feeling just as seen, heard and valued as the longtime members of the church. “You’re no longer wandering exiles. This kingdom of faith is now your home country. You’re no longer strangers or outsiders. You belong here, with as much right to the name Christian as anyone. God is building a home. He’s using us all — irrespective of how we got here — in what he is building” (Ephesians 2:19-21 MSG).
Be receptive to feedback. Churches should be open to constructive feedback from their congregation. If church members express concern or frustration, they should be met with patience, compassion and a desire to be willing to meet those needs. “Listen to good advice if you want to live well, an honored guest among wise men and women” (Proverbs 15:31 MSG).
Bring people together. We all need community — we aren’t built to survive without it. Churches should be regularly going out of their way to keep members engaged not only in the physical church but in their physical community as well. Community service days as a church body are a great way to do this. “Let’s see how inventive we can be in encouraging love and helping out, not avoiding worshiping together as some do but spurring each other on, especially as we see the big Day approaching” (Hebrews 10:25 MSG).
Centerpoint Church is ready to walk with you on your faith journey
At Centerpoint, our community believes in purpose and passion, and we would love to walk with you on your journey in finding yours. You can also find out what our community’s purpose and passion are all about by checking out some of the past sermons we’ve posted on our website.
Do you want to grow in your faith, or are you simply curious about who this Jesus guy is? You’re not alone. We encourage you to listen to our podcast series online and welcome you to come to one of our Sunday morning services in Valrico, Florida.